Do not want kids dating

09-Jul-2014 21:06 by 10 Comments

Do not want kids dating

Shouldn’t it be easy for Jane to find a baby-free man?After all, don’t we men prefer to be free of those pesky rug-crawlers and the burdens they bring?

“I’m not saying everyone, but most.”And, he explains, having kids is often part of the relationship package.“There’s a desire to have affiliative gestures and build a life with someone,” he says.

I never aww’d at babies or daydreamed about my wedding. Conveniently, he was feeling something for me at the same time.

I pictured myself at 80, alone and fabulous in sequins and false eyelashes, smoking cigarettes at a hotel bar. It was different than all of my previous relationships, and I was unprepared for how real it all got, and how quickly.

What’s keeping Jane from finding that special long-term someone? She had her tubes tied six months ago.“My dolls were friends, not babies,” she laughs over the phone one rainy afternoon. (And no, Facebook friends, Jane isn’t her real name, so don’t try stalking her.) We’ve talked before about her finding guys who don’t want kids.

It turns out that besides yours truly, she knows only one other man who isn’t into the whole babies thing.“I would have thought it would be very easy to find a man who did not want children,” she sighs.

What these women fail to realize is that they might change their minds.

It’s not because they're women, and it’s only partially because they're young.We don’t imagine all of the things that may happen to us that could change our perspective. I have some experience with being unable to predict what will make me happy.I was a serial monogamist in my 20’s despite knowing with great certainty that I would never be anyone’s wife or mother. At 30, after ending a long-term relationship of 6 years with a really great guy because I couldn’t move forward, I found myself feeling something for my closest male friend of over a decade.When it comes to meeting men, Jane faces a bit of a challenge.You’d think she’d have no problem finding a boyfriend. She’s even a bit nerdy (face it, nerdiness is hot).When searching for a partner, everyone has their own priorities.